Disclaimer, this is going to be a very honest, slightly lengthy post so buckle up.
For the past few years I have been battling with some different fears. I thought they were normal, and in a way they were so I justified them and let them spiral out of control. Many of you reading this probably suffer from the same exact fears and that’s why I decided to share my journey of finding freedom from these fears.
I tried to make them come to an end by praying, declaring, reading scriptures, talking to people, etc. While all of these things are and were good, it still didn’t take this looming fear away.
One day this fear just became too much, so I decided to talk to my intern from school about it. She asked me what this fear made me feel and to me it immediately seemed obvious, it made me feel FEAR. But when I stopped to think about it deeper, the second was the lack of control this possibility made me feel.
You see, it’s really easy to believe God will come through on things that you could potentially control even if he didn’t. The things that are really hard to believe God with are the things that you have absolutely no control over.
For instance, it’s easy to believe that God will provide a job, because he’s probably come through in that area before and if nothing else you could go and get a low paying job. But it’s not as easy to trust that God will come through with healing, because you can’t heal myself. Or that he will provide a spouse, because you can’t make someone love you. Or that your spouse will be protected, because you can’t always protect them. Or that you will one day be able to have kids, because you can’t make that workout. And the list goes on and on.
When my intern asked me this question it took me on this pathway of really getting to the bottom of this fear. I immediately realized that even though I was fighting the fear, I had never really stopped long enough faced it, or to “sit in the feeling”, as she worded it.
You see, fear doesn’t fight itself. I can’t just hide behind my phone and friends and expect for fear to go away. I have to remove distractions and stop long enough to recognize what the root of my fear actually is. I have to be willing to stop, and get to the bottom (or the root) of the problem and cut it off from there.
Sometimes that requires that I go to the worst case scenario…the “what if” thing that scares the crap out of me. I have to go there, find the feeling that goes along with that place and attack it head on. This is a super scary thing to think about doing but once you do this, the fear no longer has power over you.
When Jesus died on the cross he faced the worse case scenario, being without God, and ruled it like a boss. He faced rejection, being without God and taking on the darkest sins that could be imagined. Because he won he gave us the power and authority to win also.
Because he won I don’t have to go anywhere without God so whatever fear or thing I’m facing, I can dominate. He gives us the power.
At the end of the day, whatever fear or thing I might be facing, God is a good God and he provides a way out. We just have to put down the distractions long enough to recognize what it is that’s actually going on.
Whatever your worst fear might be when you really get to the bottom of it you will probably realize that even if the fear came true, it probably wouldn’t be as bad as you thought it might be. Say you loose your job, well you go and get another one. Say that person leaves you, God’s got someone better in mind. Say you die in a plane crash and you die, you go to heaven.
God’s got a plan in everything and whatever happens, it happens because it’s all part of a bigger plan. Let’s not let fear be the most socially acceptable sin in the church anymore. Don’t let fear paralyze you from doing what you are called to do. Face it and fight.